Sunday, April 19, 2009

How to impress your friends with your new Philadelphia-area stair and rail

How To Impress Your Friends And Make Your Neighbors Jealous (and get your wife to look at you like she used to) In 13 EZ Steps. Or, better yet....How to Treat Your Stair And Rail Contractor

Step 1. Contact your friendly neighborhood stair and rail expert (we'll call him Ron) @215-694-5046 or ronstairs@verizon.net to make an appointment for your free consultation.

Step 2. Enjoy free, informative, consultation with your local stair and rail expert and learn all the things you always wanted to know about your stair and rail, but were too scared to ask.

Step 3. Eagerly anticipate receiving your clear, concise, fair-priced proposal, within 1-3 business days.

Step 4. Slowly smile from ear to ear as you carefully examine and re-examine the proposal and realize all that you're getting for such a good price.

Step 5. Show your wife proposal. Be cool about it though. Ask her what she thinks. She likes it too? That's great! (I knew she'd like it.)

Step 6. Dial your special hotline # 215-694-5046 and say something like, "Hey Ron, we just got your proposal, and, uh, it looks good to us, so I guess I'll sign this right away and send your deposit with it first thing tomorrow morning, and we'll wait on your call to let us know when you have a definite install date.

Step 7. Bask in the glow of your wifes' sudden enjoyment of your company. (and the rail isn't even started yet) (I think she digs you....no seriously I do)

Step 8. Accept Ron's call days later to confirm/schedule install date.

Step 9. Watch with awe and amazement the master at work, as he transforms your former funky foyer into a fabulous, fantastic foyer.

Step 10. Heap praise and encouragement upon your new, favorite contractor.

Step 11. Thank him over and over again as you give him the final payment (with a bonus totally optional) (and try to stop grinning so much.)

Step 12. Throw a party. "Everybody dance." Show off to all your friends. (hand out a lot of my business cards)

Step 13. Continue to bask in the glow of your wifes' sudden enjoyment of your company.

PS. My work here is done. And you're welcome. And I'm off to help your buddy down the street.